“Grief,” writes Hannah Waters in Scientific American, “is the price we pay for friendship.”
It’s a part of the deal. In order to share love with the beings around us, we sign the agreement that one of us will pass before the other and acknowledge that it will hurt immensely.
Different forms of loss hit people in unique ways, but the general graph of grief follows a predictable pattern—the ones who are closest hurt the most to lose. In dogs, this can result in anxiety, attention seeking behaviors, visible sadness, and more.
There are ways to support your anxious dog on their journey to feeling normal again, but it just might take a while before your dog adjusts to their new social circle.
The Pain of Losing a Pet
When you lose a pet, the ache can be just as bad or worse than the ache that comes from losing a human. An animal bursts into your life, serves as your best and most trusted confidante for a decade, then leaves—abruptly. It’s indescribably hard.
You start to realize all of the things you didn’t before. The underlying meaning of their daily presence becomes clear and you’re left to feel every ounce of emotion you ever had for them.
The den that dogs carve out in our hearts is especially deep because they, too, are very emotionally intelligent. Your dog loves you about as much as, or more than you love them. That’s part of what brings us so close, and we slide into a feedback loop of love that produces some of the most meaningful relationships on planet earth.
We know that this process ends and leads to incredible sadness for ourselves, but what is the experience like for dogs when they lose the ones they love?
Do Dogs Grieve?
All signs point to the fact that dogs grieve when they lose a pet sibling or a human parent. We can’t ask them about it, but we can clearly see signs of grief in dogs in the wake of a death.
It's evident that many dogs grieve, although there isn't enough scientific evidence to make that claim definitively.
They might become withdrawn or depressed. They might paw at the leash their deceased parent used to pick up each morning. They might gaze at the spot where their pet sibling used to lay on the couch.
As those things start to happen in the wake of loss, your dog might be gradually recognizing the reality of the situation. There’s no way (that we know) for dogs to immediately grasp the death of another unless they’re there to witness it.
A Slow Process
When a sibling or companion dies out of the house, your dog might simply feel the weight of their absence until they piece together that someone isn’t coming back home. That process could be slow.
They might not dwell as much in the higher brain about the details of the loss, but research into our own brains tells us that grief weaves through memories, nervous systems, and immediate experiences. Those things, in large part, occur deeper down in the brain rather than in the frontal lobe and neocortex.
Instead, the emotional center of the brain is the limbic system. This is an ancient component of the brain that emerged long before our large frontal lobes did. In large part, the emotional experience is directed and produced by the limbic system.
Dogs are also equipped with limbic systems much like our own.
Canine & Human Brain Similarities
As we move inward from the neocortex and closer to the brain stem, we start sharing more and more brain chemistry with dogs. This is because humans and dogs were once the same species, so the areas of our brains that we share often produce the same results in modern life.
For example, the experience of anxiety in dogs is one that humans can empathize with because we feel it too, and anxiety comes from the same parts of our brains as does the dog’s anxiety.
Many of the emotional and cognitive centers of our brains are shared with dogs, although we enjoy them in different proportions in terms of mass, importance, and function.
Why Dog Emotions are Similar to Our Own
We struggle to empathize with a dog's feeling of grief because we know dogs don't have the same ability to think about the loss that we do. Take the thoughts away, and how could the emotion look the same between species?
Think of the last time you were hooked by your emotions. When was the last time you behaved in a way that was out of line with your values or at odds with your best attempts at thinking logically?
Those situations occur because your emotional hardware effectively overrides your logical software. Your brain defers to emotions because swift emotional reactions keep us safe in dangerous situations. That doesn't help us when we're at a family dinner, but it certainly helps when you encounter an angry Grizzly bear.
The Same Thing is True for Dogs
This emotional override happens to dogs as well. A beloved dog might be triggered by something and behave in a way that they would never otherwise behave.
The point of this aside is that grief is one of the most powerful emotions there is, and powerful emotions emerge mainly from the limbic system. Dogs also have limbic systems that guide their emotions, and while human grief is partly intellectual, the majority of the experience comes from a part of the brain that we share with our furry friends.
Italian Canine Grief Study
A review of an Italian study published in Nature starts out by setting the score on what we currently know about canine grief—turns out, there is almost no scientific literature on the subject.
426 Italian owners who owned two dogs, one of which having recently passed away, were given the “Mourning Dog Questionnaire.” Results showed that:
- 67% showed more attention-seeking behavior
- 57% played less
- 46% were less active
- 35% slept more
- 35% were more fearful
- 32% ate less
- 30% vocalized more
In total, 87% of dogs studied showed signs associated with grief.
So, Do Dogs Experience Grief?
There’s no definitive scientific proof yet, but mounting evidence and countless real-world observations suggest dogs do experience grief in their own way. Behavioral changes, lethargy, and loss of interest after a companion dies are strong indicators of emotional pain.
Dogs may not understand death the way we do, but they unmistakably feel loss, confusion, and loneliness.
Frequently Asked Questions About Helping a Grieving Dog
1. How can I comfort my grieving dog?
Maintain their usual routine for meals, walks, and bedtime to give them a sense of security. Offer gentle affection and quiet time together, and allow them space if they seem withdrawn.
2. Should I get another pet right away to help my dog cope?
Not immediately. Introducing a new animal too soon can cause additional stress. Wait until your dog’s behavior and energy seem stable before considering a new companion.
3. How long does grief last in dogs?
It varies. Some dogs recover within weeks, while others may show signs for months. Most dogs begin improving once their environment and daily routine feel normal again.
4. Can CBD or natural calming aids help a grieving dog?
Some owners use vet-approved calming supplements or CBD oil for dogs to support relaxation. Always consult your vet before starting any supplement.
5. When should I see a vet about my dog’s grief?
If your dog refuses food for more than 24 hours, shows signs of depression, or displays severe behavioral changes, it’s time to visit your veterinarian to rule out other causes.
